I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
someone owes me an orgasm
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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