I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
