i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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