Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy

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  (248): I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy http://tfl.nu/0s17
  Replies (10) Good night (913) Bad night (1400)
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  (714): View more from California

  we're chasing vodka with high fives

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  (714): we're chasing vodka with high fives http://tfl.nu/2m9s
  Replies (38) Good night (17564) Bad night (1227)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.

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  (407): He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven. http://tfl.nu/duyw
  Replies (10) Good night (944) Bad night (4173)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  wrong number but thanks

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  (443): shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten. (610): wrong number but thanks http://tfl.nu/9cua
  Replies (18) Good night (8188) Bad night (906)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...

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  (480): It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless... http://tfl.nu/qugn
  Replies (8) Good night (2071) Bad night (1019)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.

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  (845): 3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year. http://tfl.nu/9uak
  Replies (9) Good night (2867) Bad night (938)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.

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  (267): i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man. http://tfl.nu/8n1a
  Replies (3) Good night (1548) Bad night (743)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?

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  (715): I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME? http://tfl.nu/q3mm
  Replies (12) Good night (2306) Bad night (758)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma

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  (512): I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma http://tfl.nu/4ovd
  Replies (12) Good night (1156) Bad night (1771)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...

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  (724): Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out... http://tfl.nu/jn6b
  Replies (2) Good night (492) Bad night (1008)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee

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  (603): I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee http://tfl.nu/okty
  Replies (1) Good night (712) Bad night (370)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.

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  (404): New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold. http://tfl.nu/ite7
  Replies (3) Good night (766) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY

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  (971): HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY http://tfl.nu/i8rb
  Replies (2) Good night (664) Bad night (626)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that

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  (774): He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that http://tfl.nu/j7eg
  Replies (1) Good night (763) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail

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  (201): You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail http://tfl.nu/z9lx
  Replies (4) Good night (667) Bad night (353)

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