"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
These 27 Hilarious People Wrote Their Own Obituaries
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode