Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Damn victory sex feels great
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
