used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
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