she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
It's official drugs can't kill me
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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