The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Randomize
