is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
