So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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