so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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