My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
