I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
So much Jack, so little girl.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
