How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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