Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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