I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize