batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
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