Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
