sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
