STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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