I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
