is your mom at the bar?
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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