Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
