Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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