my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob