That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I've blown a few things in my day
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize