we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
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He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
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Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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