How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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