I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
