you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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