the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
