I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize