he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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