How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
