she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize