whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
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