i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
