Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
