I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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