You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
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i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
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I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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