Are we in a gay sports bar?
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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