you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize