Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
