So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i dont even know how to be here
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize