Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
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