8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
