if only i could text you this smell
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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