You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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