I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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